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The Dragonfly...WJ2-40-D10.D11

The Dragonfly has somehow become one of my favorite symbols. I never noticed until it was pointed out to me that I own several things dragonfly, but a friend of mine several years ago sent me a statue of one and she told me it symbolizes continuing life.  Well upon looking up the dragonfly, I found out it symbolizes many of things including this:  "Maturity and a Depth of character The dragonfly, in almost every part of the world symbolizes change and change in the perspective of self realization; and the kind of change that has its source in mental and emotional maturity and the understanding of the deeper meaning of life."

This seems to go hand in hand with what I am trying to achieve on this weight loss journey. This week has been a fail. Not an epic, or major fail, but a fail nonetheless, but this time I know things are different, because even though I am losing my grip on this I know that when I don't do so well in one aspect, I will try to make up for it in another. For instance, this morning I woke up not feeling so hot and fighting off a cold (which better not turn into one!) and decided I better not walk this morning, but I know before I go to sleep tonight I will get my 15 minutes in somewhere.

Slowly I am learning that the success to weight loss isn't just counting calories and watching what you eat, but it's in believing in yourself and balancing life with changes one is making.  I am an emotional eater, I admit it, but getting that under control has been my biggest challenge and is partly what lead to several bad days this week. By identifying that (literally as I write this), it helps me to sprout my wings and keep on flying, because I know that it didn't break me and I know that I have a lot of life to live.

The point is, when you weigh 248 pounds (yep, I have lost two pounds since starting two weeks ago, not enough, but still lost it), losing weight and trying to change can become overwhelming to the point where you just don't care and you want to give up, because that is easier.  You have to believe in yourself and know that no matter how many times you might feel like you're failing, you're not.  Remember, every road has a bump in it.

I never believed this journey was going to be easy, but I also never imagined it would be this hard. I suppose that right there is a bit of self realization and that will help me to keep my wings buzzing...

Until tomorrow...

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